Two Years Ago Would've Been A Different Story
by YouAndIAreForever
Summary: Story begins in February 2012. Penn and Blake.
1. Chapter 1

_Chapter 1_

* * *

The incessant knocking ran fluid vibrations through his apartment. His brows creased in concern as he rose from the couch and paced to the door, swinging it open in confusion. She stood there, hands trembling and lips fidgeting as her eyes searched his brown ones; fear seeping through the pupils as she gazed at him, sympathy scorched into the fainted lines around her eyes.

"Blake...wha- what are you doing here?" his left brow creased over the slightly condensed eye, bewilderment mixed with concern etched into the corners of his face. She smiled a broken smile as her eyes lingered on his for a second longer before they dropped to the floor.

"Can I umm..." she paused, her fingers rubbing together as her vision became blurred from her stare. "Can I come in?" Blake looked up, her eyes immediately speaking a language to him that only few could understand; luckily he was one of them. His face dropped as concern washed over his features. He gulped and stepped to the side tentatively; allowing her to walk into his apartment. The slow movements of her feet only emphasised the rise of concern in his mind as he watched her cautiously wander across the apartment. The rhythm of her brown boots tapping against the floorboards came to an abrupt halt as she twisted in her spot to face him. The discrete sunlight from the frosty winter's afternoon shone onto her back, fighting to skim past her tall figure.

Her eyes were focused on his now as he took a slow and careful step closer to her, gently stretching out his arms towards her ever so slightly to express his aim to comfort her. She took a hesitant step backwards, a creaking erupting from the worn floorboards. "I'm uhh..." Fear trembled through her bones, guilt burning her stomach as she stood still, trembling. Her head elevated upwards slowly, looking deep into the chocolate brown eyes of his, in hope they would calm her down; they did. Just like they always did.

"I'm pregnant, Penn." Her face creased into a sympathetic, half hearted smile. "And it's yours." His mouth fell agape, his eyes widening as he took an immediate step closer to her shivering body. Useless, one syllable words fell from his quaking lips as he outstretched his arms further this time; his hands resting timidly on her back. His fingers gripped at her coat slightly, pushing her towards him. She moved towards his open arms, her head falling onto his shoulder, her cheek lying against his chest; lips hovering just below his neck. He ran slow circles over her lower back; his head rested on hers as his quiet breaths travelled across the hairs on the top of her head. Tears formed in the corners of her eyes as she wrapped her hands tightly around him, clawing at the lower half of his back.

They were enclosed in a bonded embrace, memories and reminiscent thoughts fluttered around them, circling their figures. _'Two years ago this was everything I wanted' _spilled from a litter of cluttered thoughts that span painfully around her brain. A comfortable silence encompassed them; time stood still as he took paused to absorb her words.

"I'm sorry" she whispered. His hold on her tightened at her words, desperate for her to believe this wasn't her fault and that she had no reason to be sorry.

"Oh god, Blake. You- you don't have to be sorry. I- I mean are you...are you okay?" He pulled away, hands still resting on her back as he searched her face for signs of distress, signalling at an answer to his question.

"Yeah. I guess..." a small smile crept across her lips, thankful he was so understanding. This certainly wasn't something he wanted when they were together or at least, not yet; just imagining what he was thinking now made her shake with guilt. "I guess I'm just worried about everything. Not just the being pregnant part but the..." she stuttered on her words; her breaths were ragged as a wave of emotion ran through her as the words rolled off her tongue. He squeezed her tighter, his hands continuing their cycle of her back. "I just...", she heaved, chest pounding from exhaustion. "Zoe is gonna break up with you and Ryan is going to break up with me and I just can't believe I ruined it all." He sighed heavily as he watched her broken eyes flicker around his shirt. He took a moment to respond, searching to find the right words before he spoke.

"You didn't ruin anything, Blake. Everything's-" he paused; taking a moment to truly convince himself of his words, if he didn't believe them, there's no way she would. "Everything's gonna be okay. I promise." His gaze rested on hers once more as he felt her body loosen ever so slightly in his grasp.

Numerous questions spiralled around his mind as they stood in comfortable silence, but he knew he couldn't ask them; at least not yet. Right now he just needed to be there for her.

Minutes later, she broke away from his embrace, tentatively. Her arms slipping from their settled spot on his back. She dropped them to her sides, hanging them in shame. She had never been this broken, ashamed, guilt-stricken. He looked at her, waves of empathy and understanding glazed his deep brown eyes, watching her mind race with fear.

"Hey it's gonna be okay, you know." He spoke, reassuringly as he followed her to the couch. She was so bruised and battered she couldn't even formulate a response. They sat in companionable silence as both minds raced with thoughts and ponderings. The noises of birds and the beeps of cars had taken over the atmosphere of the dimly lit room, breaching through the windows of his small, but unique apartment. The softness of the Brooklyn sounds were violently interrupted by the sound of her phone. She jolted in her seat, the noise awakening them from their frozen world.

"Hi, hi." She stammered into the phone, noticing the caller ID. "Umm I'm just, shopping, walking around a few shops." Her eyes sunk to the floorboards as she uttered her lies. She'd lied to him about a lot of things recently, avoiding one enormously significant truth. "Yeah, no we can do something tomorrow; I have the day off so...", faint mumbles echoed from her phone that was clutched in her grasp. "Okay, yeah. I'll call you. Bye." Penn's eyes were rested on delicate face, watching as she uttered through the lies and deceit.

"I should go." Blake looked up at him for the first time in a while; rising from the couch in the process.

"What no, I mean we..." He paused. "We have a lot to talk about". They stood; bodies metres apart and eyes resting at the same level.

"Like what? I mean what is there to say?" She snapped, pacing towards the exit.

"Hey." He grabbed her arm in protest and twisted her round. "I know this is hard, all of this. It's all…you know it's all gonna be hard but I'm here for you, don't think that I'm not okay? Or that I don't wanna talk. Because I do, whatever it is. I'm here." She felt as though her heart had melted in the past few fleeting seconds. She was so scared; petrified in fact that he would be angry and shout or cry maybe and throw things. But he didn't and he hadn't and he was being exactly what she needed him to be.

"Thank you." She smiled as she looked at him, trying to ensure he knew just how thankful she really was.

"Okay." He beamed in return, leaning to kiss her on the cheek. His lips softly brushed against her skin, creating a half smile in response.

"We'll talk tomorrow, okay? Right now I just...I need to be alone."

"Okay, yeah." She turned her back on him as she clutched at the door handle and swung it open. "Blake?"

"Yeah?"

"What I said. I meant it. And not...not just as the father." Tiny droplets of salty water formed in the bottom her eyes. A wave of emotions flowing through her throat as she gulped away the tears. She nodded as she turned once again, and this time she didn't turn back, and she shut the door on his confused and slightly saddened face.


	2. Chapter 2

_Chapter 2_

* * *

Blake was slumped on her brown leather couch; her mind clouded with numerous complex emotions she wouldn't even try to comprehend. Her thoughts were so conflicted, and they had been for the past 3 weeks. Little did she know, on the other side of town Penn was in the exact same place.

He sighed as he downed another sip of his luke warm coffee. Head spiralling; his eyes caught a glimmer of light bouncing off the corner of his guitar.

_"Well morning" she rested her figure against the door frame, her eyes watching him as his fingers danced around the strings of his guitar, his lips stringing out various hums._

_"Well hi." Twisting, he turned to look at her glowing figure hovering at the door, wearing nothing but one of his old shirts and boxers._

_She slowly stepped towards him lowering her body to sit next to him on the patterned rug. Her heavy locks of blonde hair bounced around her shoulders and swayed from side to side as her body fell to the floor. _

_"How do you always look so beautiful?" Her head titled and bowed at his words, smiling shyly at him in return. "You look better without makeup, you know that right?" _

_"Penn" she reasoned. _

_"I'm serious" his head moving closer and closer to hers as a genuine smile danced on his lips. He gently pressed his lips against hers when he pulled away slowly she returned the kiss, raising her hand and resting it gently on his neck. _

_"Have I ever told you, you have the most incredible voice?" Pursing his lips, Penn smiled that playful smile that she loved so much._

The persistent knocking at his door snapped him back to reality, like a bolt of lightning trough the clouds of the past. "Coming!" He heaved himself from the couch as he ambled to the front door. "Hi." He spoke, taken back a little at the sight of her face.

"Hi" she spoke calmly; her voice had always been soothing to his ears.

"Is everything okay?" he asked, as concern seeped through his bones.

"Yeah, yeah. It's just we didn't get much of a chance to talk earlier...so I thought..."

"Yeah! Yeah, now is umm, now is good." He replied, smiling as she wandered towards his living room.

Sat on his couch with her feet sprawled across the wooden tiles he arrived from the kitchen, bending at her side. "Where shall we start?" He opened as he handed her a mug of coffee.

"How about how we tell Zoe and Ryan without them wanting to kill us?" She joked, firing a smirk in his direction.

"Good place I start I think." He replied in a serious tone before they both erupted in laughter, but only for a second or two before they resumed to comfortable silence.

"I've been thinking about how to tell Ryan for so long and I'm just so scared he's gonna leave me, you know?" His comforting eyes met hers as he nodded in reassurance.

"And it's not just, you know..._that_ we're pregnant it's uhh..." He stumbled, pausing at a difficult topic. "_How_ we got pregnant." He coughed, trying to obliterate the slight awkwardness that had fallen between them. Trying to erase the memory from her brain she shook her head, looking away from his now slightly tense and wooden face.

"You haven't told Zoe yet, have you?"

"No, no. She's uh staying with her parents this weekend, so" Penn stirred his drink, avoiding her now watchful eyes.

"I think we should tell them together." Penn spluttered a little in response.

"Wha, are you umm…" He laughed. "Are you joking?"

"What?" She questioned, not sure why he found her suggestion so amusing.

"You seriously think telling them together is a good idea?'!"

"Oh my gosh, no. No! I meant like on the same day! Not together! Oh god, now I know why you had such a dramatic reaction!" she chuckled, creasing her nose as she did so. His eyes rested on hers; as they amused themselves over the misunderstanding.

"Yes but, on the same day. Yes. Definitely." He spoke seriously.

"So what day?" She asked, worried he was going to say 'tomorrow'.

"Tomorrow? I mean sooner rather than later, you might start showing soon! Or not…I don't know. How long have you known?" Raising his head to look at her from across the couch. Her face fell from his, eyes landing on the brown tinted rug on the floor beneath her feet. She was waiting for him to ask this.

"Three weeks." She confessed, feeling guilty at the utterance of the first word. His eyes widened, fingers brushing against the surface of his skin, sliding down his cheek.

"Wow."

"I'm sorry, I'm so…I was just so scared, about all of it and I was scared to tell you but I knew you had to be the first to know I mean I just, I didn't want to tell anyone but I knew you'd understand. Actually that's a lie, I was so frightened you'd be mad at me or..." Starting to tear up, she trailed off, leaving her sentence unfinished.

"Hey." He crawled closer to her as he scooted across the couch. Wrapping an arm around her he pulled her towards him. "I'm not mad okay. I wasn't when you told me and I'm not now. This is not your fault. You have no reason to be sorry, okay?" Pressing her lips together like she always did she looked up into his deep brown eyes.

"You're amazing." The words slipped out from her lips before we brain had had a chance to consider the repercussions. His movements fell still; his eyes still flickering about her face. Frozen; they watched each other. Their breathing turned heavy as any sign of emotion dispersed from their dead-pan expressions. "So is this coffee different, it tastes ummm…it tastes different." He gulped a little as his lips pursed watching her eyes dart away from his.

"No…no it's the same. Haven't changed it since." For the first time in a long time the atmosphere was uncomfortable; unease flooding the apartment. An unsettled Blake stirred away at her coffee, distracting herself from the mood that had fallen between them. "You know ever since you told me I've, I've just been thinking about how much easier this would all be if it was two years ago." Pausing to catch his breath, he continued. "I uhh... I used to think about this, you know if this would umm…would ever happen. Sometimes when we were together, or if I was just on my own, I'd think about this, you and me…getting married or having a baby together. I know I said we were too young, and we were too young but it didn't mean I didn't think about it, or dream that it would happen one day, it was all I wanted you know?" Blake's eyes were filled with tears; there was not one surface of her eyes that hadn't been polished with water. Her vision was blurry until she blinked away the droplets of water, only causing them to fall slowly along the lines of her delicate face.

"Don't say that!" Her voice almost as loud as a scream as she darted up from her seat. "Don't you dare say something like that; do you think that's easy for me to hear? That was all you wanted? Then what about me? I was the one that wanted those things, I was the one that said I wanted us to get married and you were the one that said no. So don't pretend that you wanted that because even if you did, imagine how much I wanted those things, and then maybe you'd know how I felt!" Blake yelled as she stormed across the apartment, making a bee-line for the door, slamming it on her way out, leaving Penn guilt stricken as the ringing of her words danced around his ears.

Dismay was etched into the corners of his face as his fingers slowly traced the outline of his mug; stillness and quiet enshrined in the atmosphere of his apartment. It always felt lonely after she had gone, stripping away her bubbly personality and childish grin that would bounce when she laughed was left in only his memory.

* * *

A/N: Sorry I took so long to update, I guess inspiration is lacking a bit, hopefully I'll get into the swing of it soon! And thank you all for your reviews so far! :)


End file.
